Welcome to our family! I hope you like chaos, drama, and a never-ending supply of chatter. This family has five daughters ranging in age from 15 to 27 so you can imagine the constant commotion. The oldest two girls are married and have two children each. The remaining three girls all have boyfriends so this puts our family gatherings around 12 to 16 people regularly. Family for us is about love, forgiveness, compassion, and instruction. The most important part is love; love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things. The Lord created us to have a family to offer an understanding of His love for us. Raising five girls has been a tremendous blessing and an incredible learning experience, both for them and for us!
Many people believe that your life is dictated by the way you were raised. If you were raised in a stable loving home then you will continue that cycle and raise your own children in the same way. And if you were raised in an abusive unstable environment then you will raise your children in the same manner. I believe that we all make our own choices that we choose how we are going to live. Many may disagree with me and that’s okay, but I’ve seen kids raised in good homes take the wrong path and I’ve also seen kids raised in difficult situations make the right choices. Life is the sum of the choices that you have made both good and bad. My own childhood had everything necessary to make a “LMN Movie of the Week,” parents fighting physically, divorce, drugs, moving from pillar to post, and a mother with a mental illness. My mom tried to do the right thing and she did teach many valuable lessons, but then all I could see were the mistakes she made on a daily basis. After all these years I now realize that she did the best that she could and it shaped me into the person that I am today. I chose to do things differently, to give my family a stable home filled with love that allows everyone to feel they are valued and that their opinions matter.
Since we have allowed our girls to voice their opinions there’s always an important “opinion” to discuss in our home. Everyone feels they have the right to express their opinion about another person’s dilemma. This leads to the family becoming involved in each others personal life and when I say personal I mean personal. I love that my family is concerned and that they want to be involved with each other, however it does lead to some very sticky situations at times. I have always encouraged my girls to be open and honest with me, but can I just say as a mother sometimes there can be too much honesty. Occasionally, the older girls have shared a little too much information about their personal life if you know what I mean. When that happens I just put on my poker face and keep listening (I save my shocked expressions for later). With all the honesty floating around my husband will sometimes share too much information with the son-in-laws, they laugh and then go home to tell our daughters how stunned they were about the comments. Well, so much for privacy after 30 years of marriage and five kids! 🙂
To sum up my overall views on family it would go something like this:
- Enduring Love Always
- Listen (Really Listen) to What Your Kids Are Saying
- Validate Their Opinions
- Instruct Them in the Way They Should Go
And the most important one is Prayer. Pray daily for your children, your significant other, and for yourself. Ask the Lord for wisdom in how to guide your kids and He will provide. Life is never easy, but it can be full of joy! 🙂
Till Next Time,